Some friends of the family apparently are on the governor’s Christmas card list, and when we went to their house last night, I saw this on their counter. After I stopped laughing at them, I took a picture with my phone, so please excuse the poor quality.
The expression of the younger kid is priceless. Usually it’s Patti who looks so surly in photographs.
I’m currently listening to the Rev. Al Green’s interpretation of “You Are So Beautiful,” originally recorded by Billy Preston and somehow made popular by Joe Cocker.
In it, the Rev sings:
You are so beautiful… to nobody but me.
What is he implying here? Is it a testament to her stupefying ugliness, that she has a face that would make a train take a dirt road? Al must really appreciate her great personality if that’s the case.
Or is he just really possessive? Maybe there are lyrics that he left out but implied, such as: “You are so beautiful, to nobody but me (You got that, bitch? I said NObody but me, and if you try sneaking around I’m gonna smack your ass up).”
Whichever it is, I thought it sounded funny.
WGN Radio is reporting that the Chicago Cubs finally have landed the object of their offseason desire, Japanese outfielder Kosuke Fukodome.
Not that I care or anything; I just wanted to use that post title. If he’s any sort of cool, he’ll use the Public Enemy song as his entrance music.
[Obligatory snickering at his last name]
(Scott Olson/Getty Images)
Live it up now, Cubs fans. Soon the baseball universe will be restored to its proper order.
As the Cubs fall all over themselves in their push to the playoffs, thoughts inevitably drift to the team’s last postseason appearance.
I’m talking about Steve Bartman, the Cubs fan who back in 2003 restored a topsy-turvy baseball universe to its proper order after the Cubs let him get into their collective head. The fans’ rending of garments and anguished sobbing began shortly after, and it was beautiful.
After the Cubs’ graceful exit from the playoffs, Bartman was more or less forced to go underground, lest he incur the wrath of the classy Cubs partisans. But I’m happy to report that a few days ago, Bartman resurfaced to see his beloved Cubs take on the Diamondbacks in Phoenix:
(Hat tip: Homer Derby via Deadspin)
These are kids defiling a baseball diamond by playing … *gag* … soccer.
I was going to gouge out my eyes, but I didn’t have a spoon handy.
As bad as the Houston Astros have been on the field this year, their fans seem to be striking out, too.
Common in ballparks these days is the Kiss Cam, where between innings, the stadium video screen will show a couple, who are then implored to kiss for the thousands of voyeuristic perverts fans in attendance.
Well, on Monday night the Kiss Cam made its way around Minute Maid Park, finally landing on one couple:
With the couple highlighted on the big screen, the mood soured after the man took a knee to offer an engagement ring. Wearing a brick-red replica Astros jersey, the woman appeared to angrily dump a bag of popcorn on the man before rushing up the stairs amid a chorus of boos.
After the top of the sixth, the man left amid cheers from the sympathetic crowd.
Dee-nied!
And to add financial insult to the debilitating ego injury, the Astros are sending the poor bastard the bill for services rendered:
[N]ow he’s stuck with the $300 bill from the Astros, which is the tab for two tickets, the proposal shown on the centerfield scoreboard and a souvenir video of the proceedings.
“We did what we said we were going to do,” said Pam Gardner, president of business operations. “We hope these proposals will be serious and special, so people have to think before they do it.”
My feelings on this are mixed. On one hand, rejection is never fun, especially when it’s in front of 25,000 people in attendance and many thousands more on television.
On the other, though, if the guy thought that popping the question in front of so many people was the only way she’d agree to marry him, he’s got problems bigger than what happened Monday.
Better just to laugh at him.
From the No Shit Department:
I guess one has to give propers to Microsoft for their candor about their crappy product.
This is what Rally’s is giving away in its kids meals:
Tell me that doesn’t look like the Ace of Spades.
